This is life

Sit on a chair with your legs resting on another chair.
Enjoy the cool nice wind.
Listen to Floyd's "Another Brick in the Wall"
Read the newspaper.
Chat with a nice friend.
And blog about it :D

mfsgdrsolif ,fxm

Randomly hit the keys of the keyboard. Thats something i do when i am really frustrated.
I am sick of myself.
I am a complete loser.
Reaction: "What! how can u say that. u r soo good blah blah yaak yaak ....
Trust me people, i am just a phony guy who fakes very well.
I am not frustrated because of any particular reason. A lot of factors have contributed to it.
I want to rehaul a lot of things. But i wont do it. I cant. It will continue and it will all be rosy in the end, hence it wouldnt matter then.
As i was saying, i am currently sick of myself. Anyway out?? All suggestions other than those involving the loss of my life are welcome.

So did this make me feel better? No. Relieved?? Yes.

A mosqi here, a mosqi there, mosqis everywhere

This is summer. Hyderabad summer. So its hot. Not comfortable to sleep even at 1 in the night. The only way to cool your room is to open the door and usher in the fresh cool air. As every cloud has a silver lining, ever gust of wind has some embedded mosquitoes in it. Its not that i am against insect life. But the world would have been a calmer place had these insectia minded their own business. But these under-developed beings are quite curious about humans. Actually the mosquitoes suck. Suck the human blood for their experiments. But they have an hidden agenda too. They seem to be nocturnal beings. And their collective aim seems to convert poor innocent homosapiens like me into their kind. No, not into insects but into nocturnals. As soon as you lie on the bed, and switch off the light, they set to task and start all their sucking experiments (all puns intended). Why allow them into your room in the first place you may ask. But unless, you invite these, your room's temperature isnt going to be pleasant. But once these are in, you can forget all chances of attaining the goal of holidays - sleep. So, you are going to be awake anyway.
After a few hours, before the sun is about to wake, the mosqis return to their haven, and i can visit my heaven for a few hours before the noon-day door-bangings begin.
What a lame guy, losing his sleep over a few mosqis. Before you leap to any such conclusions, read on.
Jet mat. The only guy affected by its aroma is me. So, then the great war begins. Observe the flight, analyse the curve, learn from the previous sorties of the mosqi, wait for the oppurtune moment to strike. Notice! the mosqi is within reach, the mosqi is slowing down, out shoots the hand to capture the intruder. Succesful you may have been, but before you even have a chance to gloat, you are faced with a flying threesome. You win another battle. But the numbers dont decrease. After exhausting yourself, you sit for some time, only to chance upon a new batallion flying all around you.
Raise the white flag. Huddle in front of your dear pc, and type down your miseries.

A post ...

I am blogging now just because i havent blogged in some time now. Actually dont at all feel like blogging these days. Nothing to be frustrated or bored of. Not required to do anything. So cant postpone something by blogging (instead of doing that task). Since am comfortably leading a calm peaceful lazy life, nothing to blog about. What a leisurely life!!

Alas, these days will soon come to an end...........

The Unending Election Fiasco

The sole aim of this post is to expend my frustration. Better read the post below if you have come here to appreciate my writing style... :D

Election
Re-election
Re-Election Nullified
Another Re-election to be held in the next sem.

I guess this is just half the story. Who knows how many more re-elections we are going to have before they are finally satisified with the elections. They here solely refers to the Ec and the Slc. What the HELL do they think of themselves??
I really wanted to reply to them. But had to restrain myself, whats the point in spammimg? Already two people have put the grievences pretty well. I expect the Ec answers them soon. Otherwise, they are going to get lot of hatemails.
If anyone has a misconception that things can get better at IIIT, then well, you have a misconception. Things only seem to get worse. (Except the Canteen though, it rocks as of now.)
Dont the Ec realise that they are responsible to the students? Particularly the contestants? First of all, on the evening i.e the end of the first elections, they cancelled the election. And everyone knew of the various leads etc. A lot of politics may have been played on that night. Then they held elections on the next day, the day of the Farewell. Only this time, they did not discover any bugs at the last minute. Hence they withheld the results. Slowly, anyhow the results have leaked out. Now everyone knows who won, so they nullify the election. What the Hell!!!
Malpractices!! What practices? The most number of malpractices seem to be done by the Ec. Actually, most of it is not Ec's fault . The Ec is just a worker for the Slc. Any decision of the Ec is basically a decision of the Slc. If malpractices are a problem, what ever was the Slc doing during the last elections? What happened then are called Malpractices. Those things are called intimidating voters blah blah. This time we had vigorous campaigning, Yes. Sometimes the campaigning bent and maybe broke some rules. Yes. But none of these are serious enough to repeat the whole process again. Silly us, we took care not to break any rule. We should have done all sorts of campaigning, broken all code of conduct etc. At max, what they would have done is another re-election. They put down some ambiguous statements as rules, interpret the rules in some way and expect everyone else to have the same interpretation somehow magically.
They plan to re held the re-elections at the start of the next sem. Do they expect the graduating people to come to IIIT and vote, or even login from wherever and vote? 1/3rd of the current voters are no longer going to vote. I wonder how many of the remaining would vote either. Why should anyone, when the probability of the re-elections again is so high!
And, Who the Hell is going to apolozise for wasting my time for so many days!! Do they even have an iota of an idea, how much effort the contestants have put in? What do they know about the time and effort taken to select the team, come up with the agenda, fight against the mis-information campaign, And Campaign!! Tell them to try to convince me why Re-elections are required. We had to convince hundreds of people why they should vote for us. Do they think, we are profited in some manner if we become MPs? This is not a pay thing. And there wont be any kick-backs either. Whoever is contesting is doing that either with genuine interest in doing something for the campus, take up some responsiblity, bring some change or else have some fun by coming out of hibernation (This is applicable in some cases).
Is this the Slc way of having 'Selection' through 'Election'? Keep having elections until the appropriate guy in your opinion wins??

"This mail is to inform the student community regarding nullification of Elections that were held on 30th March due to complaints received regarding malpractices."
The next time you do not like the way results the going to turn out, just make some complaints. They will nullify the elections.

"Fresh elections will be held under closely supervised conditions during the first week of the next academic year."
Closely supervised conditions!! What are they going to do? Put us contestants under room arrest or something??

"The candidates for SP councils will remain the same and no new nominations will be invited."
How can they assume that the contestants would still be interested in participating in this fiasco of a process called Elections?? What about new nominations to the Ec. I guess that is the most basic requirement as of now. And i guess, i dont need to start about the Slc now, everyone must have an idea of tHEiR visions.

I wanted to write a post on Campaining. How and how not to do it. Guess, some other day, when and if the fiasco ends.

Warning: Do not talk about elections if you meet me in person. I am not going to waste any more time on it.

PS: One good thing, Though having (unofficially) won the elections (despite not being the favourites), we dont need to fulfil our agenda (though we showed that we can do it).

Yet another early morning post ...

My blogging time seems to have shifted from 3 to 5. Well, this atleast allows me to witness the sunrise. These being holidays, such days are going to increase. I hope i enter decently into the fourth year after a not so impressive performance in the EndSems to say the least. A long summer is looking forward to us. A summer which may be eventful in many ways. Hopefully a summer which is cool. Lets try something different today...

She looked down the road. The wait hasnt yet ended. She is still there, on the pavement, all alone. All alone among a million people. People moving everywhere. People moving in front of her and behind her. People walking across the street, people sleeping in their rooms in the buildings lining the road. People sipping coffee and reading the newspapers. Newspapers full of news. News about the uprisings in Iraq, the political bickerings in Bihar, the company mergers, the sporting feats and ofcourse, the predictions for the future. Somehow, strangely, 1/12 of the people all over the world seem to have been destined to the same fate by these columns everyday.
Anyhow, lets get back to the her. In her red dress, she looks up the street forlornly. When will the waited come? Someone taps her shoulder from behind. She turns around slowly only to face a rag doll. A rag doll with a hand stretched out. A rag doll with expectant eyes looking up to her, hoping for some coins. A dilemna now adds onto her burderned mind. Should she give or not? The heart says "Give, she really seems to need some money, poor hungy girl". The mind says, " No, unless we stop helping these people, they wont start to help themselves. The parents conveniently send their sons and daughters to beg and then use that money instead of working hard themselves. Shouldnt encourage this practice." Before the fight between the heart and the mind ends, the doll makes its way towards better prospects. Thus, not taking a decision also turned out to be a decision.
Relieved, her mind gets back to the prime concern. How long shall she be waiting for her dear? Maybe some trouble has befallen. Maybe she should go get some help. Maybe she should just be more patient. Every passing second makes the dub-dub louder. Her gentle heart is overworking itself. Come soon, she pleads. Someone pushes her on his way to reach somewhere quickly. She murders him with his eyes. Fortunately for him, his back was facing her. Had he looked at her, he would have instantly turned to ashes. She wonders about these people. Each busy in his own pursuit, with not a thought for the people along the way. What do they do once they reach their destination? Run after another one. Run. That reminds her. And she looks up the street again. Willing an appearance, materialise into view at the peak of that slanted road. But all that appear are minute droplets in her eyes. She didnt even realise that her eyes were moist. She closes her eyes tightly. She shouldnt let anyone see her now. Atleast not her teary eyes. She should be strong. Or atleast act strong. Thats what she is has been told time and again. Be strong. Dont cry. But why? When crying can peel away your grief, why shouldnt she cry?
She seem to be loosing all hope. Just then, through her closed eyes, she experiences the pleasure. The pleasure of that familiar touch. That familiar sound. She opens her eyes. The eyes now filled with tears of joy. She bends down and gets her face licked. Who was more joyful, its hard to say. She hugs her Tequila. A hug that communicates all her love.
Picking up her puppy, she heads back home. Its almost time for school now.

Life, aspirations and everything ...

Time is 4:57 am. No, this is not another post with sleepy eyes. Just woke up. And read a nice article by an IIM guy about what and why we should(nt) aspire. And also about love.
Anyways, what i would like to know, Is there a need to have some ambitions, aspirations? Well to think, do i have any? (this question starts the great self-discovery process, after a million milli-seconds, the result tumbles out.) Do i need to have any? Wouldnt it be better to take life just as it comes. Not deliberate upon the future. Heard that this is a common question in many interviews, "Where would you like to see yourself 5/10/10++ years from now?". So, any answers?
My answer would be, i do not want to see myself anywhere 5/10 whatever years from now. I would rather, be there then, and be here now. Rather than having an ambition and running after it, maybe its better you walk, enjoy your walk, you may not have a destination, but thats the beauty of it. How many times have you enjoyed a walk when you had to get somewhere quick? And how many times have you enjoyed a walk which didnt take you anywhere in particular?
I dont think there is any such thing as a destination in my life. Or rather in anyone's life. You may want to achieve something, By the time you achieve that (or not achieve), your so called goals are set somewhere higher (or lower :P). A goal is nothing but a mirage. Why am i sounding like a self-help guru? :-SS Theres a lot of money in that field though...
Another benefit of not having any goals. No regrets. No disappointments. At the same time, not having a goal is not a passport to being useless. It does not mean that you neednt be sincere in what you do. The primary aim (if any) in life should be that you dont feel bad about anything that you did or didnt do.
Why am i preaching? That too something that may not make much sense. At a time when i have an endsem in 4 hours and another in another 10 hours. And i havent even started any preparation for the first one. But it doesnt really matter. What would you prepare for an exam that doesnt have a book, doesnt have any syllabus and you have no idea what you would be tested on. Its an open book, but i am not taking any book. Not due to over-confidence but due to the insufficient knowledge of what book to take :D. All that you can arm yourself with for facing such an exam is your luck and confidence. A dash of intelligence would also help i guess. :D
Finally, where would i like to see myself 5/10 years from now on? "Living a lovely life". Rephrasing it, "Continue living a lovely life" ....

Morning, morning...

Yeah, it is morning. Almost. And why am i blogging at this godly hour? Because, i couldnt fall asleep. These days my sleeping time has extended to beyond six. To think, before coming here, i was a good boy who used to sleep at 11!
Long time that anything abstract was written here. The time has come.
Two and two make four. Similarly one and one and one make three. But two and two dont just make four. They make two pairs. Two ones make one pair. But what if the other two ones arent supposed to be a pair? But, since the first two ones have made one pair, these two ones will also have to make a pair. More out of neccessity than of desire. But will neccessity lead to desire? It depends upon the environment.
Abstractness ends here.
Exams in a few days. I hope to set right my habits before that. Actually just 2 days now. I better change my sleep timings back to normal. Otherwise, would be sleeping through all the exams, be they held in the morning or evening. As a final touch to this post:
Conjecture 2.4.05: Irrespective of the number of hours already slept, any kind of Study induces Sleep almost immediately, but if persisted with Study, without succumbing to Sleep, the result would be Hunger (no counter-example found yet).
Actually wanted to write 'Experimentally proved' in those paranthesis, but the great Sage has enlightened me that a Conjecture if proved would no longer be a conjecture but become a Theorem.

Why Hyderabad rocks....

Because, after torturing you with unbearable heat for some weeks it suddenly transforms into an abode of rainfall and showers upon you the pleasant smell of water wetting the the sand. They say that the first rain after summer is always sweet. Other places may experience such a phenomenon once a year. But we here, experience it many times a year. And ofcourse, hyderabad is also full of rocks. Finally, i have decided that i am in IIIT to study. So i guess, it ll be back to slides and stuff for a week. Thats it? A week of study and you complete a semester? There are some perks ....
This post is being brought to you by yours truly after sleeping for twelve hours. Finally, i am left with only two things to do. SS= Study and Sleep. So as my preferences are quite obvious, i am going to make full utilisation of this oppurtunity.....
Let the weather remain so for the rest of the summer! Well, in that case, it wont be summer anymore :D......

Fared Well...

Gave the farewell to our seniors today (technically yesterday). And it went pretty well. Was very interesting and extremely funny. Our Seniors rock! And so do we :). I had thought that our batch had transformed from a groovy batch to a groupy batch. But, the farewell has shown that we can still accomplish many great things together :D. When we were making the Story Presentation for the Cd yesterday night, i looked at the various photos of our seniors and it made me very very envious. They seemed to have been partying every other night in their final year and going out every week. That too in big big numbers. Sometimes all of them. Our batch hasnt gone anywhere yet. When will we? Will we ever?....
Regarding the elections, it was reheld because the earlier system had a bug! Somethings just cannot be helped.
Some people stop being friendly towards a person when they are jealous of them. But once they too taste that success, or achieve that envious unattainable, they are once again friendly and humility personified.
So the moral of the story is that its time for me to sleep (After two sleepless days and nights).

With a hungry stomach...

Wake up at lunch time. Get ready and feel extremely hungry. Walking sprightly to the mess and then on the way it strikes you. You dont have any lunches left! You had a breakfast left but that was sacrificed for sleep. And you have no lunches left. You had a lunch yesterday, but you were at home. You must have eaten breakfast less than 10 times this month, yet you do no have any more breakfasts. This is unfair!
Lot of changes happening at home, but i havent been noticing despite going home every week. No longer are the summers going to be hot and exhaustive. The air is conditioned now. It led me to remember the first time i experienced the effect of an AC. So young i was, had gone to then Madras, entered some room and wow, felt cold. Really very very cold. But somehow, no amount of technology can ever beat the exhilaration of a cool wind on a pleasant evening with a lot of clouds lurking in the sky. Sitting in a non-manicured lawn, plucking the grass and paying a bit of attention to someone beside you, chatting away to glory. Even that person knows that you are not really listening to him/her. But he/she keeps talking anyway, just because he/she wants to talk to you. I guess i would prefer a she rather than a he :D.
There are some things in life you can always look forward to....

The Campaign starts...

Finally we started it. Met quite a few people today and impressed upon them the benefits of voting for us. In short, if they want a better, more vibrant campus, they have got to vote for us. Now at four in the morning i end up at my room. Exhausted. Why am i even doing this? How would it benefit to me that if we win the elections? No, a single line in the resume is not of my concern. I would certainly have many other things to write there. I guess, i do not really know. All i know is that, of the candidates who are contesting, no one comes even close to being as fit to be the CLC as we are. Aaaah. I got to get out of the campaign mood :D. So what if we are very good for the job? That is no reason for me to be interested in this. I guess, the initial blame lies with cc. As for this time, my close association with Pranav actually led to me being in his team. I dont think anyone in the institute can understand Pranav more than me. Now that is quite an achievement:P. So what does it result in? Me finally coming to room at 4 in the morning. Tired and thirsty with not a drop of drinking water to be found anywhere in Obh. And currently i can do nothing about it. And i am dying of thirst. Neither do i have the energy of going to Nbh to get water. I got to wake up at 7 anyway. So i dont see any point in sleeping either. Moreover, i am too thirsty to even sleep. I am actually hungry too. Todays menu wasnt strong enough to make me visit the mess. So here i am, contesting an election, hungry and thirsty without any sleep....and bored also :D

no memories...

Just read a blogpost of a friend which was full of the visions of her parents' childhood. The streams, forests, plantations, trees and paintings. Just made me think of my so called memories. Sorry, i really dont have any worth mentioning. Not even those of my parents. Both having been brought up in towns, i guess i lost out on the rural aspect of life. I have never been in a village! I dont have any memories worth speaking of. Just a few incidents here and there. Just have been living a drab life. Existence without any beauty. Nothing worth remembering. Nothing i remember either. Pity myself. What a life. Not good enough to be a memory or induce nostalgia.
Had a voter meet. Of not much use though. It was more of a platform for people to expose the shortcomings of the others. As regarding the case with my team, people came with a fixed mindset of not listening to Pranav. Though he finished in 5 mins, they thought it was 20 minutes. And all questions were on canteen. And no, they didnt want to listen to the reasons. Just were trying to point out that he failed. They did not want to know the facts. Cant help it. I dont even want to campaign. If they sensibly think before voting, read the agendas etc, then its fine. But i doubt how many do that. I dont think even 10%. I guess they would deserve whoever they get. But, we being highly educated, i hope that our elections arent as blind as in general it happens in india. But, i guess i am hoping too much.

Is it worth it?

Elections everywhere. The elections for student parliament make some sense atleast. But for the PS post, which i dont understand why anyone would want, the elections are taking a very bad turn. Can see the politics everywhere. It hits you in the face. The Indian politics in a small scale. Groupism, regionalism, favour, bribery, everything for an election among 100 people who have known each other for 3 years. I would say, let them be, whoever is desperate to become. We certainly deserve the politicians we get. Approach people for your committee whom you would not even approach for an assignment, approach them just because they would then influence some people to vote for you. It really sucks. A batch of 92 has to play dirty politics just to get a person to represent them for the job offers. And when, the jobs are almost guarenteed for everyone. And people are being included in the committee not on basis of their ability but rather whether they represent a particular section of the batch..... I no longer like our batch.

Elections for the parliament. Another muck. I am already sick of hearing from a few that the only good point in my team is me. What do they know what pranav has done till now? And, we obviously need some votes from UG1 if we are to win. But the only way i thought it was possible to get some votes doesnt contribute to the well being of that batch. So, to win, we have to campaign strongly, but campaigning strongly may lead to unwanted problems among the batch. So, in short, if the campus is to get better, we are to win. To win, we got to get votes. To get votes, we got to get them from UG1 and UG2. Getting votes from UG1 may lead to divisions in the batch. Our batch was together atleast for two years. I have no idea what i am supposed to do. I no longer seem to be interested in it either. I guess, i dont like to fight without decency. I cant stoop to lower levels just to get a membership in the parliament. But, i believe that the only way the campus and our lives here can be improved (which is really needed) is by us winning the election. What is the point?

With a blank mind...

... am writing this. Today must be the day of the longest hours of classes. I missed the first one at 8:30, even then the total hours came to about 6 and 1/2. In the small breaks, i had to finish the work for the election. Right from deciding the third team member, to filling the form, getting the signatures and submitting it. Nomination form for the Campus Life Committee of Student Parliament. The guy who is standing for the secretary post is the great sage Vasishta. Hope he wins. He really deserves it. No one else would have done as much as he has done for the institute. No. This is not for impressing the voters, but the truth. I being the second member, the third member of our team is a nice MS guy. Our opponent is again my friend Arpit with a first year and another second year guy completing his team. We had offered him to be in our team, even the secretary post if he wants, but he was adamant on contesting against us. And there is this third team which is contesting for fun i guess. I hope we win. This Campus really needs some improvement. And this is not restricted to food alone. I guess campaigning is going to play a very important part in deciding the winner. It seems to have already started. But somehow, i dont feel myself cut out to the task of going around asking for votes. It feels strange. Havent tried it yet. Just tried on a few friends. Still felt strange. Guess, i got to ignore these inhibitions. But i still feel, that there shouldnt be any campaigning. Just put your agendas and sit quiet. Ofcourse, if some one asks you for clarifications on your manifesto, then you are welcome to do that, but otherwise, you should be silent and allow the voter to make his own decision. But this isnt an ideal world. And no such thing is plausible. So you got to campaign. So campaign we will i guess.
By the way, if you are a IIITian reading this, do vote for us. :D

no sense here...

Was about to sleep. But, suddenly felt like blogging. So here i am. With a research paper on my lap, a paper that i was supposed to be an expert in, a paper that i am supposed to explain to my professor who is one of the bonds in that field, a paper which contains many concepts i just heard of, a paper that i am confident i will be able to understand by 11 when i have to present it....
The stuff below is not going to make any sense. Yes, the abstract posts are back (without a bang though :d )
Looking ahead. You dont really care. But you look anyway. Why? Because that is the direction you can bear looking. You cant turn around. you dont want to turn around. You are all alone. In reality, you arent. Forever surrounded by people, forever talking to someone or the other. Yet, in reality, you feel alone. Solitary not physically, not emotinally either, neither spiritually but solitary somehow. Do you always know what is good for you. Forget that question, do you atleast sometimes know, what you exactly want? Is it that what you crave for is what you actually want. And, i havent even started about the 'need' part yet. Do we know ourselves? If not, then who else would know you? Do we even need to know ourselves? What do you gain by knowing yourselves? Is the gain factor really relevant?
On another note, is every living being selfish? Can you call, fighting for survival, selfishness? If not, then cant anyone state that something is desperately needed for their existence, when we accuse them of being selfish? Is being selfish bad? Why should it be? But why am i talking about 'selfish' anyway. That too without any provocation whatsoever. What ever i have been typing, i have been typing just for the sake of typing......

Was supposed to be reading...

some research papers. Got to pick a paper and present it in tuesday's class. And currently, i dont even know my choices properly. Instead of reading the paper, i somehow wandered away to reading my own blog! Read the posts of some two months. Is there a difference from then to now? Thats for the readers to find out. Is there a difference in me from then to now? Not really, other than the fact that now i seem to be perpetually busy and tired. No, no. This post isnt going to crib about anything. Blogging had been a fad some weeks earlier. As expected, it died out and no one even seems to have noticed the demise. Good actually. Many have other and better things to do than just plainly chronicle their daily life in not so interesting details.
Was dining at a restaurant yesterday along with ravi and tejo. A form of relaxation after two days of 'showcasing'. Waiting for the waiter, i and ravi somehow suddenly started playing hockey. How? The knives were our sticks and the goals were the salt and pepper tins(couldnt recollect a better noun for that thing) and the ball was what is called generally as soap (not the bathing kind nor the television kind). I am not sure if it indeed is called what i think it is called, anyways, it did serve well as a ball. The game couldnt be completed as our wait ended a trifle sooner than i would have liked. So as not to be accused of hiding some details, let me also mention that ravi was leading. :D
What is this relationship between work and sleep. When some work confronts you, sleep attempts to capture you unawares from behind. So what does it result in? You kicking away the work and going away with sleep on a dream date. :D.
Well, got to go now, my date is waiting for me....