Monday, June 12, 2006

From 'nothing to write' To 'forgetting to confer a title'

On the bed .. trying to sleep ... u realise the effort is futile and so get up and come back to the pc. Cntrl+T and then go to, log in as mythalez and click on create-post. And then look around wondering what to write. Some more minutes tick away. Nothing comes to mind. Go to some of the frequented blogs. Read some of their old posts as none have updated in the past couple of hours. Come back to the create-post tab. Still nothing in mind. Chat with Pati, the only one awake at this ungodly hour. Still nothing to write.

Its not that there is nothing to be told. A lot of what can be said is expectant of being conveyed, but you instinctively realise that nothing of that would come out well when spoken or written. So, you discard them all and are left with just ephemeral ideas whose flicker dies out even before they sufficiently illuminate the mind. What you have is perennial darkness with speckles of sparkling light droplets that relentlessly change their locations appearing and disappearing at will.

A couple of days and I will vacate my room. Yeah leave IIIT forever. Leaving with mixed feelings. Wondering how a computer would look in my home ... hey actually my pc did spend the first couple of months of its life in my home, but then it was different.. that was way back in 2003 summer when i finished my first year at this place. Had newly installed windowsXP and RH9. Desktop had the available default wallpapers of windows and linux. Windows was mostly used to play Caeser, Quake and Cricket. Linux was booted into to be tinker with. BackStreetBoys used to be the most played english band. The browser used to be Iexplorer and Konqueror both of which were rarely used. Ymessenger was a non-entity.
Now, the pc obviously still has WindowsXP (fourth time installed and already a semester old) And FC3 along with it. The wallpapers in both the OSs have been set as desktop background directly from the net. The only games now existing on the pc are Yeti Games (the penguin ones), 3 flash games, bookworm and hangaroo. /home partition has so many files that I have long ago proclaimed it to be an impossible task to clean up the home dir. BSB doesnt exist in the pc anymore though 7.4GB of the 40GB hdd is occupied by english songs. The browser in both OS is firefox and is almost always running unless the pc itself is switched off. Ymessenger and Gaim are the first programs to be executed when the pc boots into either OS.
However, the hardware is completely unchanged .. including the seldom working rarely used floppy drive. So different yet its still the same?


Sreejith said...

"left with just ephemeral ideas whose flicker dies out even before they sufficiently illuminate the mind" - that was very visual. well written :)

mythalez said...

thanku thanku ^:)^