Monday, August 30, 2004

Not the Continuation of the below...

Sometimes, somedays...
without any reason
from deep inside you
the pain arises from within

I dont know what the matter is. Just dont feel like doing anything. Actually just this isnt much of a problem. But you also become restless. Have not much of any idea of what is bugging you. Well sometimes you do, but then you can see no counter-measures. Even if you do know some, you wouldn't want to try them. Because, in truth, u want something and are unable to obtain it, but the desire is so well hidden within you that you do not even acknowledge its presence. In anycase, is it your fault that you desire something that you are sort of hesistant to accept ?
And when you start writing about it, even then you do not state it explicitly. Just try to work your way round it.

Got up in the morning at somewhere near eight. Looked at the watch, looked at everyone quickly getting ready to go to class, just thought for a second and then went back to sleep. The beginings of an eventless day.
Again got up at 9:30. Had another class at 10. An excellent prof. So i forced to myself to take a bath and sauntered into the main building at 10. We had to submit an assignment then. Luckily he agreed to postpone it till tomorrow. It is usually a very interesting class. Today was no different. Yet in the later part of the hour, i could barely keep my eyes open.
However i fully woke up at the end of the class. After the class, instead of going to the hostel as usual, i ventured in to the library. Another clue to the fact that today wasnt a normal day. I then read about how to set the drivers for Wlan card in linux, when there arent any available for linux, noted a bit of it down and finally got back to hostel. Immediately set about the task of installing the drivers. I finished quite soon. But i wasnt sure of whether they are indeed installed. Also i had no idea how to setup the connection to Wlan.
Had lunch and then returned. Woke up Tejo and sent him to the mess.
Just fell on the bed. Though wasnt feeling so sleepy, i wasnt inclined to get up either.
2..3....4...... woke up finally. Ofcourse there were many intermediary attempts by various people to wake me up but in vain. Went to birthday-boy's room and again fell asleep. Woke again after another hour. But wasnt anyway refreshed.
Just thought about all the things that i needed to do. Then I had these thoughts. Why am i doing anything at all ? i wanted to think of replying to that DIgLib maintainers mail. But then had afterthoughts as to am i not already having more than enough (though these days i am not doing any of them).

There is a desire,