Crossed fifty yet going strong.........

Yeah....i already have fifty posts. So i guess that established me as a non-frivolous blogger. Though of all the fifty posts only a miniscule must really make sense. This is the last sensible thing in this post. Because whatever is going to follow this is being typed by a person who desperately needs some sleep but is feeling too bored to sleep. Too bored to sleep! Whatever happened to me. I guess the root cause is that i am frightened of all the work that tomorrow is going to bring. It is obviously my fault. I had the whole week to do it. But why should i? Whats the point of trying to do something if there is still time left? Why even attempt something that is easily solvable? Why not sleep when you really need it??

A journey after 3 years

I am blogging after what seems to be a long time. Have been pretty busy all this time. A new sem has started, registered for courses went to the town for two days, have again become a TA and a lot of other things have occurred.
Went home on 16th night after the registration as we had to leave on the next day morning to the town to attend the ceremony. That was when i realised that i was actually going out of hyderabad after three years :-O Three years!!! The last time i sat in a train i didnt even knew in which branch in would be graduating!! I didnt even know to move the mouse properly then! That is sure a long time.
Woke up early morning on 17th, i didnt feel like i slept at all. So after the initial rush, we were sitting comfortably in the train waiting for the 5 hr journey to begin. Surprisingly the train was full, almost. I expected these two days to refresh me. And i expected it to start in the train itself. Maybe it would have, had i not spent most of the time sleeping. :D
So reached my grandparents place by afternoon. We went out of the station. I was surprised to see so many Autos, a sign that the place was expanding. So my mom asked a rickshaw wallah whether he would take us to my uncle/aunts hospital. I mean thats how we refer to the area where we needed to go. Everyone seems to know them. She asked him (in telugu ofcourse), "will u take us to So n so's hospital??" He said sure and after some bargaining about the price, i had a not so pleasant rickshaw ride. A few roads were being relaid so he took a new route. My mom found herself in unknown territory and asked him where we were, then he said that we were going towards their home!(Thats where we actually wanted to go, but we used to give the hospital which was nearby). So he even knew their home. Finally we reached home. I mean my grandparents home.
A lot of people were there, but there werent as many as i thought would. Not that i knew any. Iknow no one other than the close relatives. But everyone seemed to know me. Even the miniscule minority who didnt know me earlier, would know me now, as i was introduced to them by the other majority. But i knew none, before, none now. I was tired of hearing that i had grown thin, this that blah blah.
I guess they all would have got the idea that i am a studious, aloof, shy kind of guy who just reads books. Well its not my fault. I didnt know what else to do ? The younger cousin, whose house it was, brought a few books out on the first day. So most of the first evening was spent reading goosebumps(i had always wanted to know how they were) and other such children books. The remaining time was spent sleeping. As if all the sleep wasnt enough, i also slept through the night thus missing the actual ceremony for which we had come. :D
The next morning was spent at the new house. (It was a house warming ceremony) So finally returned late afternoon after lunch. The rest of the evening of this second day was dedicated to sleep and His Highness Abdul Kalam. Wings of Fire. Though i didnt complete it as it was looking as if i preferred books to people which was actually true in that case. :D:D
So finally the night, we boarded the train again and i reached sweet hyderabad after two whole days. Afterall, hyd is Hyd. Soon i was back in the institute attending Software Engineering.
I had a few good experiences too. I was pleased to find a few people who were knowledgeable about a lot of things including IITs,IIITs etc. Also there was a nice discussion in which a US returned old man explained to another traditional kind of old man, how people practise their religion and compromise their beliefs according to their ease. His points against superstition were quite good, though now i dont remember any.
Also my Uncle and Aunt are really very sweet people. Etc.
A trip after a long time. Thats what it is.
I am submitting this post without previewing it since i do not have the patience to read such a big and boring post. No idea how you have been able to do it. :P
i have a feeling that a lot of chat-typing style must have crept in this post.

back on net....

Its more than 24 hrs that i am back in the institute. Spent most of the time watching movies or playing. I dont know why, but now i am in a very strange sort of mood. I feel bored. Bored of everything. Dont feel like doing anything at all. Nothing at all. Doing nothing. Thats a good thing. But i dont even want to do that. I dont want to work, dont want to sleep, dont want to play, dont want to talk, dont want to watch any movie, dont want to chat, dont want to blog either!
A new sem is about to start. I have changed a lot. Others have changed too. The world itself has changed a lot. But then again, its all the same. I cant figure out any difference. Yes, a lot has changed. So what? Its the same if looked at in a certain way. I am too bored!! I know. I better stop before i go crazy.......

Going Home...will be back on net soon

So i am finally going home today, 5 days after my exams were over. I was among the first whose exams were over, and am among the last to leave the hostel. But i will be back soon. Or so i think. My mood may change once i go home. Will sleep peacefully for the next three days, sleep all the time, morning, evening and night. Just 3 more sems left, then i will be an Engineer! I cant imagine. Well, the oh-so silly post that is below this one, to put an end to that ambiguity, well here it is - the whole thing has passed now. It was okay but now i dont seem to have any sort of feelings for it anymore. What am i writing? I am not making any sense. Lets just forget about it. :D
Corrected the papers yesterday night/today morning with considerable help from dilip. I am still here also because of him. He is yet to complete his assignment. Do it soon, i want to go now!
Copying Calvin n Hobbes onto my pc currently. I think it contains all the newspaper issues. Bill Watterson just rocks!!
It finished copying....and that signals the end of this post.

A few days more

Another day and my exams would be over. Not that i had worked for them or anything, yet just for the relief. The rest of this post has nothing to do with exams.
Two more days, hopefully. Will it be how i thought it would be? Dont know. Thought about it a lot of times. Had a lot of apprehension whenever i imagined about it. But now, when it is so near, i feel somehow calm and content. This is usually the case. Actually now i have even stopped thinking about it. Just waiting for it. Also started having second thoughts about whether i really want it. Or should it deferred? Deferred! Something for which i had been waiting for so long. Deferred!! What am i thinking? Am i not ready for it? How else can i be ready? Ofcourse i was not expecting it so soon. I thought it would take some time. But it was so sudden, came to know about it just a couple of days back. Right when i was about to start preparing for Networks. Now that i successfully lost any chance for a decent grade in it, i just hope i dont get a D or anything. Oops, I think i said that nothing in this post will be concerned with exams. Felt quite relieved today, just one more left. Had no idea what to do after the writing the literature exam. So went and talked for some time with the Calculus guy. Then came back to sweet room, tejo too came and we decided to watch a movie. I suggested Collateral and he acceeded after reading the review. Copied the first cd and started watching it while the second cd was being copied. I guess we both werent in the mood to watch a movie. Were looking at the screen passively having no idea of what conversation was taking place in that cab. Finally the second cd didnt copy. No disk space left! Hence we quit watching the movie, not that we were really watching it, but formally announced the demise of the idea of watching a movie. I came back to sit in front of the pc. And now as i am typing this, he is peacefully sleeping on my bed. :)
ps - I had to make a lot of effort to type in correct english and not in chat slang. #:-S

A new post :D

Wrote an exam today. It was in two parts. The first one contained 50 1-mark questions which we had to answer in 75 mins. I think i did pretty okay in that. Then came the second part which was open book. We could carry anything we want to the examination hall. But in reality this is just a hint to you telling that you wont find any book helpful in answering these questions. I did take my text and note book. I looked at the questions. Solved on which was for 5 marks out of the total 50 in five minutes. Later i kept staring at the question paper trying to figure what i should do. I searched the book for some time only to realise that it was of no use. So after dilly-dallying for another half an hour, i finally started wrting something. By then just 45 more minutes were left. I completed it, though i am not at all sure whether what i wrote was even remotely connected to what we were supposed to write. Then i solved another problem only to realise later that i had done it totally wrong. Will surely get a 0 for that one. The last question, i had no idea, what was expected. So i did nothing about it.
I am only thankful that hopefully i wont have to attend another class taken by that guy. You can never be sure, he can easily give F to anyone. :(

Three more days and i would have completed my fifth sem in this institure. Too fast i feel. I remember the other day when i had joined the college. What will i do after a year n half ?
Who cares.......me? I hope so. :D

Want to be abstract now but am not in the mood hence this is the end of this post.

A nice day

Sometimses, u feel lost and gone..all out. And a single day changes all that. All the problems that looked daunting now seem insignificant. The sunlight has broken throught the clouds..blah blah..... Just felt totally out yesterday...but now today has rejuvenated me. Do consider the fact that i am saying this after a hectic day in which i have already been awake for some 20hrs continuously.
Thanx to mani, we hopefully have qualified. Mani rocks.

The mind is ecstatic,
but the eye is going static
they fight with each other
and the result is drastic

Refuse to cooperate any longer
No signals the eye sends
no orders the mind gives
their obstinacy, neither mends

Will be continued (my eyes r drooping so much that i am unable to look at the screen) Gudnite.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Had to post ...felt like blogging

Why do people put filters in pine? They put filters like personal, for all mails addressed specifically to them. And each time they check mail, they need to go each such folder and check whether they got a mail. It would be much less work if they let such mails remain in their inbox. I think you should not use something just because you know how to use it. I could be being a bit harsh. Ofcourse filters are quite useful when you are expecting a large amount of mails regarding a specific topic etc. Filter or no filters, mails will still come.
I dont think i can stay without checking mail every half an hour. I have become a 200-pine freak.

Havent advanced a line in this post after the previous one as i am being continuously bombarded with IMs. This sentence is coming after a long time. I did a queer thing today in literature class. Did not feel interested in what he was talking about, and i just felt like writing something, so i started writing. I wrote down most of what he said along with my comments which went on for some 6 pages. I dont remember writing this much notes after the first year (maybe not even then). I ll put them all on site someday, the day which grants me with infinite patience.

I realised that one can most creative in the early mornings after a good nights sleep which unfortunately is a rarity for me. Even then, the only progress that i made in my story has been early in the mornings.

What is the point of life anyway? What would happen to the toppers if they get an F in networks ?? What difference would it make to life if my sentence ended with the this word? What am i writing anyway? Am i going crazy? Or are you? Is this a question? Will it have an answer? Should i preview this or post directly? Should i even post this?

I guess we know the answer for the last question. :D

rain rain come again

Its suddenly started raining :)

rain rain come again and again
the sun is just a pain
all other seasons are vain

Wrote that contest yesterday, some questions were too easy, and some too tough. Most of the time was spent in trying to parse the input (by mostly everybody). So i guess that means that the questions could have been better. Twice again next week. I hope we will atleast qualify from IIIT :D if not more.

An excellent book can be written about our lives here at IIIT. I think much better than that 5.someone. :D:D I suppose it is not as realistic as it could be. Especially about the fact that they work for some 3 hrs everyday for their 5 cg!! Here, i dont think anyone other than the 10-pointer reads so much. They also had to call it a plan with a nice sounding name for what we do usually here - copying assignments. Maybe things were different during the 90's in iits. I have no idea. The part about the girl was well written. I guess that must have been the best way to get a girl into the picture. All in all, the book was an excellent one. Quite interesting and funny. Even those who dont read often have been reading this book in one go. Also i guess this book is the closest to our life here. All this reminds me that pending story. :( Need to write soon. But what!!

Calculus.....lambda calculus

Almost a week since my last post. Evidently i have been very busy. At no point during this duration were both me and my pc free at the same time. Spent a lot of money in these few days too :( . But i also got my second pay :D.

Popl test, what a good experience. Studied intermittently between 2 and 3 in the morning, for actually some 15 mins. Then another 15 mins before going to write the exam. By the way, this subject doesnt deserve any more of our time. The best part was that, no studying was required for the questions asked in the exam. I thank the prof :D
Some people were quite tensed even about this exam. Below is a chat conversation which lead to a funny situation.

myownsiddharth: u there
mythalez: yeah
myownsiddharth: from where are u studying calculus
mythalez: frm shantinarayan
myownsiddharth: is that a book
mythalez: yeah
myownsiddharth: urs
mythalez: yeah
myownsiddharth: can u lend it to me
myownsiddharth: after u read
mythalez: ok
mythalez: if u want it u can take it now
myownsiddharth: when
mythalez: coz i need it later
myownsiddharth: wat time
mythalez: come here and take it
mythalez: now
myownsiddharth: i will take it for the night
myownsiddharth: say after 12
mythalez: no i'l need it at night
myownsiddharth: till wat time time
mythalez: if u want it take it frm me now
myownsiddharth: when do u want it back
mythalez: till 5 in the morning
mythalez: any time
myownsiddharth: till wat time i can keep it with ya
mythalez: till say 12
myownsiddharth: can i take it again at 5
myownsiddharth: or 6
myownsiddharth: in the morn
mythalez: yeah sure
myownsiddharth: i'll be there in 10 mins
mythalez: ok
myownsiddharth: bye
mythalez: bye
mythalez: n
myownsiddharth: wat
myownsiddharth: i am coming
mythalez: ok

that was dilip chatting as mythalez from my pc. Coincidentally i had one 50 year old Shanti Narayanan book in my room. So here comes the guy, looking for the book. I hand it over to him as soon as he enters my room. Then he starts looking in it for the topic 'lambda calculus'. :D
For the ignoramuses, Shanti narayanan is the author of a famous book on calculus (of the diff, integral kind) where as lambda calculus is something related to programming.
Asks questions like "kahan hain yaar, differential mein hai ki integral main ? etc" After a lot of searching in the book, he gives up and pleads me to either point out the relevant pages to him or teach him myself. We gave a lot of subtle hints, but he was too tensed to even understand that someone's leg is being pulled.
Finally, had to ask him - "what did u think? Differential calculus, Integral Calculus, and then Lambda calculus??"
Poor guy :D:D:D

Need to do a lot of things...but not doing any :D.

To The Sole Reader

A sigret is a sigret. Sometimes, one just feels in a certain different way. It may not have a reason, no apparent cause. Do not feel good, actually feel horrible. No apparent reason. Feel a lacking, what is it? Dont have a clear idea. But somehow feel that it could be some thing. Not even confident about the analysis. Then reminiscence throws up some vague notions. Then start thinking about those incidents. Start a whole lot of thinking processes. A small lacking may ignite a big desire(i am sick of this word, but cant find any suitable substitute). So then memories about the various feeble attempts made are remembered. Then, patience as a virtue seems to be the ideal one to exercise. But the whole problem had arisen due to too long a wait, hasnt it? Any small attempt may be preempted by hundreds of apprehensions. So, in the end, what comes out is nothing. But maybe just a stupid post :P

Messed up sleep

Why the hell am i sitting in front of this intelligent box at 3 in the night when i have nothing to do and have had insufficient sleep the past few days? Because i have become a day-sleeper, cant fall asleep at night. I looked at my orkut profile. It gives an impression that i sleep all the time, which is totally contrary to the actual fact :((. What has IIIT done to me! From someone who slept for more than 9 hrs to someone who doesnt even sleep for 4 hrs sometimes!! Why am i cribbing, by the way? No one is stopping me from falling asleep, its all my fault any way :D.
The guilty condemns the crime.

Looked at my blog...and realised that all the time i either talk about myself or crib about lack of sleep :D. Better change the attitude of my posts, something different is required.

Abstract once again -

I know that i neednt do it. Neednt wait for it. It is of no use. Most probably, the wait would be in vain, if not, the gain wouldnt be much anyway. But the loss due to waiting like this most of the time could be immense. The loss has not been determined as yet. But it has a very wide range. But the little spark of hope is never extinguished. (Remembered today's english class, 'sight and speech extinguished') Its not that if the hope hadnt been, then i would have moved on. Would still stay there in despair. Despair! Why? No idea. Since none is present. The fingers type what makes not much sense. The reader attempts to comprehend the maze but fails and just moves on to either the next post, next blog, or something else. I look at this later and think, what was i trying to say anyway? Well, i wasnt trying to say anything, was just trying to fill up space and time. Fill time....pass time until the time is up. But time as it is ...moves on by itself.
A none-ug3-IIITian has viewed my blog. I just hope he hasnt read one particular post.

Just trying.............out

A time of the day, everyone walking around, going about their own business, not really giving a damn about anyone or anything else. There is that old one, rushing along as usual, late as usual, yet trying to be on time, as usual. But no, there is some difference today. Some imperceptible change. Not noticeable unless you tried hard to notice it. An attempt to distinguish something that was supposed to be hidden rarely meets with success. But, there is some difference today. Clearly visible to those who care to notice it. But what about those who prefer to continue their lives ignoring any scent of change, acting as if it is just an temporary thing that would disappear in a millisecond? Going about, not even acknowledging the difference that is so obvious to others? But who constitute the others? a very small majority i suppose. A small majority? Well, yes since the other big majority does not even bother to utlilise their voting rights.
But the change is quite distinguishable. They all know it, just fear to acknowledge it. Every now and then, a small movmement gives away this fact. A small look on those faces which strive as anything to be straight gives away their secret. Its not the eyes that are blind, but the mind. The mind is not blind either, it just refuses to open the eyes. Well maybe, the mind's eyes are open too, they just refuse to focus.
All of them refusing to accept the change in the hope that it is nothing but a dream whereas a dream if any is what they are living in.
Better to understand the reality and suffer than to be happy in an illusion. Because then, when the reality strikes, it strikes too hard.

Great weather today

Was very pleasant to watch and feel. But slept through most of it. Then had to spend the rest of the time studying :(. It would have been great to go out and spend some time walking with the cool wind. No.....not writing a poem...dont wrry.
A question lingering, which one is better? Open book exam or a closed one? I thought open book because then we wouldnt need to read much, but many prefer closed book as they say that open book question papers are very tough compared to the other kind.
I actually had to think of what to write now! Very strange. Writing or not writing, blogging is a good pastime. I think i will end this post here, am unable to figure out what to write about. And whatever i am conjuring is not making any sense, and am forced to delete the whole line...

Cant think of a title

I am writing this post since i have nothing else to do. Or rather not interested in doing anything.
How often does orkut open without an error? Cant believe that it's also a google offspring. DF is truly working...but i want better threads. The present ones arent so interesting. Neither are my posts :D. Finally i am back on some decent sleeping schedule.
Saving Private Ryan, an awesome movie, though i knew that long before actually watching it, i dont think any war movie can get more realistic.
My post is resembling any other normal post which one can see on innumerable blogs!! NOoo! need to do something about it.
A story is to be written. The author doesnt actually want to write it. But he had a choice and he chose this one. So now he has to write one. Writing a story is no big deal. But when there is a need to write one, then it does not seem so easy. Stories..innumerable must have been told till now. A lot more are still left untold. Will there come a time when no new stories are left? I mean can the human race exhaust all possible stories ?? Well that is impossible. But what about the core theme of the stories. I mean can there be infinite themes as well ?
I just pose questions.
On similar lines, what about the possible tunes ? I mean music wise.

Windows, why are u so hard on me :(. I just hope i am third time lucky .......
Let me warn you, anymore trouble, i might as well install someother OS........

Watching the Sunrise

Well, after a lot of sleeping in the past few days, theres none today. The sun is about to rise now. Hey, earlier people used to wake up early to watch sunrise, nowadays we just need to sleep late to do the same thing. :D

A streak of light through the dreary night,
misty hue in air, hanging with all its might.

the sight brightens, something enlightens
the vast grass, its greenery heightens

the formation of rocks, it slightly mocks
at my unwashen face and the tangled locks.

my sleep deprived eyes, aloud it cries
'staying awake all night is unwise'

a glimpse of sun, i wait for one
but the cloud cover, attempts some fun

blocking out the rays, my patience it preys
no glance of sun, my sleepless soul dismays

the dark cloud, though temporarily shroud
the perennial sun, ultimately won !

with the breaking daylight, a marvellous sight
with the chirping sparrows, i slept tight.

Music n Dance

Last week was a hectic one (again!!) I guess my blog is getting boring, if i keep on ranting about my 'hectic weeks'. The Musical Nite was simply a superb affair. Insomnia rocked! They were jsut superb. Played like professionals. Acted like them too. The second string band wasn't lacking behind in any way either. Kiran's 'Zombie' was just mind-blowing. I dont see how anyone can get more closer to the original. Have been listening to Cranberries for the past five days. All the time spent in trying to get a decent folk dance for Vayu went in vain. Finally, the western ones came to rescue and did some folk,otherwise, we may not have had an entry at all! Danced all the time during the 'dance party'. Amazed myself, never expected to dance that much.
Why am i writing my daily stuff here? Dont i have anything better to do? I dont know. Felt like writing a post so i am doing it.
Ravi was reading my blog someday, and then he moved onto other things. I asked him whether he found it boring, he truthfully replied in the affirmative. So i thought about how a blog can be interesting. I guess it will only be interesting to someone, if the topic being discussed is of interest to that person.
" Interest lies in the mind of the Reader"
In this case, i suppose i as a person am not so interesting to him :D.
This blog id is 7331341. I think this would be my 32nd post. Till now there are some 31 comments excluding some 3 were lost due to haloscan. I cant obtain the statistics regarding the number of lines, words etc, or can i? Hey, i can - i have written some 6652 words till now, excluding this post. It also says that i had some 97 profile views till now, and that my average is two posts per week. I guess the average time that i write a post would be around 2:30 am. I hope that my parents dont come to know this. They would be aghast to know that i stay awake so late everynight. :D
So with this sentence i am going to end the 32nd post in BlogID 7331341.